While reading some comments on other blogs today I saw a link to Fundies Say the Darndest Things! I read through the Top 100 Quotes page over there and laughed at some of the quotes like these:
FSTDT! Post of the Year for 2006
“No, everyone is born Christian. Only later in life do people choose to stray from Jesus and worship satan instead. Atheists have the greatest “cover” of all, they insist they believe in no god yet most polls done and the latest research indicates that they are actually a different sect of Muslims.”Fundamentalism In A Nutshell Award
“There are a lot of things I have concluded to be wrong, without studying them in-depth. Evolution is one of them. The fact that I don’t know that much about it does not bother me in the least.”“Occam’s Razor Disagrees” Award
“I am a bit troubled. I believe my son has a girlfriend, because she left a dirty magazine with men in it under his bed. My son is only 16 and I really don’t think he’s ready to date yet. What’s worse is that he’s sneaking some girl to his room behind my back. I need help, God! I want my son to stop being so secretive!”Post of the Month
“I appreciate your recommendation, and it is intriguing, but as a pro-lifer, I cannot support an organization that is opposed to the death penalty.”Fundie Debate Tactics Award
“Make sure your answer uses Scripture, not logic.”No award just in the Top 100
“I don’t care about logic or science, the Bible says the moon and sun move.”Best Christian Debater
“Evidence that the Bible is God’s Word
1. It claims to be.”No award just in the Top 100
“What part of I know that the bible is true because the bible tells me that it is true do you have trouble understanding?
Don’t you feel silly disagreeing with such a logical argument?
Love and blessings Don”
Sadly there are too many other quotes that aren’t funny, they are sad and/or dangerous.
Saddest Post of the Year
“Just recently my son Bobby came out to me. I had been worried for awhile. His teachers said most of his grades were slipping and he seemed depressed and withdrawn.Bobby said he’d been hiding it for awhile because he was afraid I would reject him. I sat him down and told him that I loved him and that God loved him, but that his salvation was in danger if he did not resist his unnatural tempations. I told him how being gay would mean he would live a shorter life, and that if he couldnt change his orientation he could be celibate like most the ex-gays are. He started crying saying something along the lines of “I knew you wouldnt understand! You’re just like everyone else!” before running to his room and slamming the door.
What did I do wrong? I dont want to lose my son, but I fear I already have. I talked it over with his therapist, who had the ludicrous idea that homosexuality was unchangable and that trying to repress could lead to lots of psychological damage (I’ve dropped him and will try to be finding another therapist with more moral beliefs). I wouldnt be surprised if he’s the one who’s feeding my son all the homosexual propaganda about how its ‘ok’ to be gay. That, or how homosexuality has engulfed the media, making it seem ‘cool’ and ‘hip’ and how they were just another oppressed minority. You didnt have to worry about seeing two men making out on tv at my age! I dont want to sound like a fanatic, but Im worried what other effects will come out of this increasingly secular, immoral society obsessed with filth.
Am I too late? Or is it possible to save my son
[Note: the boy eventually took his own life.]”No award just in the Top 100
“[about a girl being born with mental disabilities]This girl is like a leper so what she needs to do is try and find god
if she really believes she can be healed from this state, she will be healed from this state
Most afflictions like this are caused by sins committed while still inside the womb. If she can repent for what she does god will embrace her and make her as human as you or me but if she chooses not to she’ll always be like this
god tests every one of us [emphasis added]”
Proudly Marching Into the 16th Century Award
“AIDS is caused by immoral behavior, not by a virus.”No award just in the Top 100
“I AM here to be my husband’s “personal maid” and to be “stuck in the house.” I showed plenty of verses that showed that – the 31st chapter of Proverbs! Wives are to be a help meet for their husbands. I consider it a privilege to cook the meals, do the laundry, clean the house, rear the children, pick up clothes he may leave lying around, clean the kitchen counters after he makes a sandwich…… […]Yes, women have rights – the right to obey God’s Word…….”
Fundamentalism in a Nutshell
“[Am I in discussion with a human who has a functioning brain?]
What does a functioning brain have to do with the Bible?”No award just in the Top 100
“Interestingly, and sadly, all we see on the internet and in society today is talk about domestic violence; but NEVER do we hear anything about statistics on wives who refuse to obey their husbands. It is evil. It is just as sinful for a wife to frustrate her husband through insubordination and disobedience as it is for a man to commit domestic violence. I am not lessening the sin of domestic violence, I am emphasizing the sin of wives who rebel against their husbands by not being obedient. I realize this is ancient mentality to feminists today; but it is 100% Biblical doctrine. A wife is expected by God to obey her husband. Feminists are eagerly willing to crucify abusive husbands; BUT they won’t even address the issue of wives who disobey, mistreat, and frustrate their husbands. It takes two to tango.Please understand that I believe a wife who is being physically abused should leave if she feels threatened; but not divorce. Such a wife needs to sincerely ask herself “why” her husband is being abusive–there’s ALWAYS a reason. …”
Post of the Week (1)
“If u have sex before marriage then in Gods eyes u are married to that person if a man rapes a woman in Gods eyes they are married it sucks for the girl but what can we do lol”No award just in the Top 100
“[Commenting on a study which suggests that women who exercise by doing the housework can reduce their risk of breast cancer]Missing the point. It’s not the exercise. Joggers and Pilates people – and the sun-worshippers – are the ones getting breast cancer. The explanation is this. It is God Who gives you cancer. A woman who keeps house, and bears the children God gives her as a gift, and prays the Rosary – no abortions and no pills – will be cancer-free, all other things being equal. “Blessed is the man whom God corrects; refuse not therefore the chastising of the Lord, for He wounds and cures, He strikes and His hands shall heal” – Job.”
Paul Hutchinson's Blog 